There are pros and cons living so closely to the in-laws. Our homes are only 2 houses away from each other. Actually, I can say we got along really good until the baby. Why? Let me start the story.
Don't get me wrong, my MIL is a very nice lady, overall. But sometimes she doesn't seem to know 'what and when' NOT to say something. Before the baby arrives, everytime she would want to start a conversation with me about OTHER babies or kids, I would stop her immediately before she finished her first sentence. Because I know she would COMPLAIN about other people's kids.
For example, she would say like "... this kid has a weird body shape, the hip so BIG ... " (this girl is tall and she has almost the hourglass body shape) or
"... how come this kid so 'yoke suen' (ugly) look ..."
(I dislike the word 'yoke suen' as it is rather a rude word to use, I would use 'mm leng' - not pretty instead, something not so heavy)
But MIL likes the word 'YOKE SUEN' very much. She uses it so often. She also likes to repeat the complaint more than once. I would say to her, "OK ... I've heard it already, don't say anymore," or something similar in a polite manner of course. But when I go over to them home again the next days, she would want to talk about that again.
I wasn't sure if she got my point or not, but sometimes I really feel like not going over to her house because of that. Sometimes I don't feel like 'pantang' (superstitious) but sometimes I do, especially when I was carrying my baby. To say my MIL is not superstitious that's not true because I've seen her doing things to be superstitious too.
I have always told hubby to teach his mother about this because is his mother and I don't think I am suppose to do the job of teaching her the right manner, but he would say no use to even try as she won't listen. He didn't like to talk to her much either. There are couple of times that really made me MAD because of something she said purposely and I didn't call her to come over to see Brandon for a day or two. (I will explain why I need her to call first before she comes over in another post) Sometimes also hubby's fault because he would tease his mother about little things.
This happened quite a long time ago and I was debating if I should post on the blog about it, but here it is now:
The story begins **There was this time in the evening last month (Aug), I was preparing to cook dinner while chatting with hubby in the kitchen. My back was facing Hubby and when I turned over, suddenly standing behind and beside him was MIL. She kept quiet there and I was a little frightened due to her sudden appearance without any indication (door bell, or saying hello). She was like a shadow that just come into our house. Our main door was open but the screen door was close, and usually there is a noise OR she would say HELLOO.
Then I said to Hubby in Chinese, "How come she came in also you didn't tell me," then he jokingly said, "is just 'soh poh' (crazy old lady).
Then MIL said, " ... soh ma sang soh jai, soh jai sang soh suen." (translation: crazy/stupid mother gave birth to stupid son [ie Hubby], stupid son gave birth to stupid grandson [ie my son]) Mind you, I was standing there all the time. MIL should have watched the things that come out from her mouth. Hey, not your son gave birth one lar. I was the one that gave birth to your grandson. In directly, she unconciously said something to meant that I am stupid and my son also stupid. I was already fired up inside. Steam was coming out. I was so mad at her that evening that I didn't want to see her or let her see Brandon the next few days.**
There are many other occassion she said or did the NOT so right things. And I was really mad at her. And I tell Hubby to correct her but he didn't want to. *SIGH*